16 Jan Soyez l’acteur, jouer le rôle: Part 1
“Have I kissed her in any way that I have not kissed you in?!” he takes her by the shoulders and shakes her.
She spits in his face. “You’re swine.” she growls.
He throws her hard against the wall. “Regret this! Regret it now! You will suffer if you don’t!” he points at her.
“Blow me.” she smiles
“That’s it! I can’t work with her!” he throws his hands up.
“CUT! CUT! CUT! What’s your problem Richard?” the Director howls.
“I can’t work with her period. I mean how else can I say it? This is supposed to be what a Victorian film and all her responses are short answers and sarcastic slurs are you serious?” he removes his jacket. “That’s it, I’m sorry Elv. I just can’t work with her, find someone–“
“Coward,” she lights up.
“What did you just call me?” he turns to her.
“Cow-ard, C. O. W. A. R. D.” she exhales a large puff of gray air.
“Bitch.”
She walks up to him and grabs him by the collar.
“Get off of me!!” he demands.
“I am many things, but that is one thing that I am not.”
“Ivory! Let go of him!” the Director yells.
She takes her cigarette from her mouth and blows the smoke in his face.
“Cut!” the actual Director cries joyously. “That was fucking spectacular!”
“Sorry about the spit, Lenard.” the girl laughs apologetically.
“It’s okay, if we got Chuck to say that then it’s quite alright.” he smiled back humorously.
The Director puts his hands on both of their shoulders, “Gean! Len! You guys were terrific, I mean, I’ve directed many movies, with many movie stars but wow, this just being practice for class, that was honestly amazing. You’ve left me speechless!” he smiles and massages their shoulders.
Geaneve uncomfortably removes herself from the Director’s hold. “You’re still talking though.” she stares at him unconvinced.
Lenard approaches Geaneve and puts his arm around her shoulder. “I’m sorry Chuck, what she meant to say was ‘thank you for the compliment, are there any open roles for us in your upcoming movies?” he looks at her as if to signal ‘relief.’
“No, no, it’s quite alright, I like her tone, she’s really something. I’m actually surprised that she is still studying to be an actor, she has all the requirements most directors or companies would ask for.” the Director closes in on Geaneve again.
Len moves between Geaneve and the director. “I must give you our apologies Chuck, but we really have to get going.”
Lenard pulls Geaneve by the hand and they disappear into the crowd of the film crew.
“Jealous?” Gean questions monotonously.
He pulls her roughly through the people. “ME? Jealous? What are you talking about?”
“Then why are you holding my hand?”
He lets go. “Well obviously, I’m trying to get us out of here.”
“Why? And in the middle of a talk with Chuck, seriously?” she stops in her tracks and stares at Len.
The crowd dissipates and it’s just the two of them. Len turns to her from a distance. “Your acting is too good.”
“Again, jealous?”
“No.” he pauses. “I want you.” he stares into her.
“Stellar,” she smiles “But why? I hate you.”
“And that’s exactly why.” he grins.
They fade.
[Story Exit]
I stared desperately at the computer screen and read what I just wrote, AGAIN for the fifth time.
I just don’t get it. All I seem to write are silly love stories with sarcasm. It’s annoying me! I thought to myself, but most seemingly it didn’t matter what I thought to myself if a good story couldn’t come from my chrome dome. I felt like a starving beggar that begged too much, and again I sighed and agitatedly dropped my forehead onto my keyboard.
“Rachel, how’s the book coming?” sung a familiar voice.
“See my head? See where it is? Are there any unwanted letters on the screen? Because if there are just erase them with the backspace button that my head is hiding, because I don’t care. I’m serious, I don’t care.” it was Jessie who I responded to while my head still lay flat on the keyboard.
“Jeez, is it that bad? I mean your writer’s block, not the book.” she saves herself.
“Nice save, but no, you were right the first time. The book is terrible. I hate it. I hate every last bit of it. I want to sit in a corner and cry, that’s how aggravated I am, you really have no idea.” ranting I felt the keys digging into my forehead.
“Come on, don’t be like that.” Jessie pulls me by the shoulders and lifts me up.
“Blah!” pulling from her angrily I manage to hit my head on the LCD screen in front of me. I began to laugh when the thought arose in my mind that I could travel to another dimension just through the computer screen. But then eventually I came to my senses and stood up. “I’ve got it!”
“What?” startled.
“I’m hungry.” I stare at Jessie as I felt my stomach growl and my eyes become inset.
She sighs as we walk out of my apartment. “The shapes of the keys are on your forehead.”
“Dope, it’s a new trend, you should try it.” I was being honestly sarcastic. But on a side note, I was just trying to avoid the fact that my story was trash.
It was outside where I stood, in front of the five-story building where I lived. In front of that same building where I stood on the steps and dropped my glass mug of coffee when I saw my boyfriend (ex) kissing a fucking ginger across the street. It was the same building that I stood on the side of the stoop puking my guts up after I returned from a party to reboot myself from what I saw the same day at four in the morning. The same building that I moved into when I started college and was fresh out of high school and from the state over– New Jersey. My humble abode could be found on any map, on any site, specifically Google that stated it was in Soho, New York City. This building was on 6th and Watts street; calm in the mornings, noisy in the afternoons, and sleepy during the evenings.
By now me and Jessie were halfway to Mooncake Foods, a cheap and cute little restaurant that served ‘plates and salads for lunch as well as Wonton soup on cold days.” and believe me, I had many cold days. We or rather I was a usual customer to this place, so the waiters knew me by name and face so unless I had a guest with me, like today, would be the only reason that they would ever have to approach me with their little notepads to find out what I would be ordering.
So Jessie ordered a plate of Octopus and Spinach Noodles (Yuck! Octopus…) and I got my usual, a Fruit Salad, it’s a tasty and nutritious meal. Finally once the waiter left Jessie looked at me, I knew the look, it was the “what’s gotten into you look.” Great, confrontation.
“What’s gotten into you?” Her eyes darted around the room and then focused in on me.
Of course you’d ask that, maybe if you’d keep out of my business for a week or two you wouldn’t have to ask. I could’ve said that, but I didn’t so I kept it in my head, so instead I just looked at her and stayed silent.
“Rach, you’ve been like this for five months, wake up and smell the roses or coffee or whatever the hell makes your nose perky. It’s a new day, forget that damn guy–“
“It’s not even him anymore!” I interrupt and get loud. Other customers look at me, I ignore them. “I don’t know what it is anymore okay! I’m sick of you asking, or assuming that it’s about Craig, that cock sucker can go and well suck his own cock! I’m just–“
“Rachel, here is your Fruit Salad and for your friend, her Octopus and Spinach Noodles.” says a waiter who seems to know me all too well, it was Peter; his soft smile makes me at ease.
“Thanks Pete.” I regain my cool and smile at him.
“Breathe, heartbreaker, breathe.” he grins and starts to walk away. “Call me if you need anything.” he disappears into the portal behind the doors labeled “Employees Only”
“Pete? Well, well, well, and who is that charmer.” she curves her lips into a grin and raises an eyebrow.
“He’s no one.” I laugh and shake my head as I begin to dig into my Fruit Salad.
Actually Peter is someone. He is a significant someone, who I had just recently… well not recently, over the course of the five months that Jessie had assumed that I had been mourning my ex-boyfriend, that I had been seeing on the down low. It was the first warm night that I had found in August that wasn’t too hot or too chilly; I was on the roof of my building, leaning over the edge smoking a cigarette. My face had been stained with black lines from my mascara and of course, I had been crying about Craig. I had been startled when I turned around to see someone’s silhouette holding a blunt object in the light of the open door that read ‘ROOF’ in huge white caps. I almost attempted to run until I froze.
“I’m a neighbor! Please don’t be scared!” he panicked.
I was silent, because I thought I was supposed to be panicking. Since I could only see his silhouette I stared hard.
He approached me with his hand raised towards me. “I’m Peter, sorry for scaring… Are you okay?” his eyebrows wrinkled. He saw my face.
“I’m Rachel and don’t worry about it.” I shook his hand and proceeded to wipe the lines from my face.
“I’m sorry, I didn’t mean to interrupt your thinking session as it seems but I came up here to water the garden.” he said to me as he left my side.
I could see it now, the ‘blunt object’ he was holding was actually a watering can; I was surprised because I didn’t think people still used those anymore. I watched him, his face was softly lit from the light of the moon, and since I was staring at him so enchantingly it would’ve seemed as though we were in a movie but no, I was just curious as to the fact that someone like him existed.
“So, you’re a neighbor huh?” I finally said.
“Yes, as are you.” he laughed and smiled.
I laughed too, I liked his smile.
“I’ve seen you many times before,” he looked at me and then looked away again. “But, I’ve always been too nervous to say something.” Crouched he continued to water the plants.
“I think I’ve seen you but I guess I’ve really never paid much attention…” Wow, that just made me sound like a bitch; I bit my lip and started to talk. “I’m–“
“Oh, I see…” He sighed.
“I’m sorry,” I started again. “I didn’t mean for it to come out that way, I’ve just been… well you saw the lines on my face so I would assume you’d understand.” I pointed to my cheeks.
“I do! I do!” he smiled. “Well, I hope you feel a little better, I mean I do. I actually feel relieved that I finally have the chance to speak with you.”
“Crush?” I grinned and moved my lip ring from side to side.
“More than that,” he stands facing his back towards me, silhouette again.
“Honesty? Amazing,” I stared almost aroused by his confidence. “Stalker type?”
“Never, just a bit timid,” he walked around the 4×9 garden and found a new spot of plants to water. “Besides, you’re gorgeous.”
I stared at him, almost flattered. “Thank you Peter, but looks don’t mean anything. I mean for all you know I could be a serial killer.” I gave him a toothy grin.
“I doubt it, from the way you speak and under those lines of pain, you seem like a girl who understands life. You seem experienced.” he stared into my eyes but I looked away and turned around to finish my cigarette.
“I’m very experienced, in a ‘fuck-me’ sort of way.” I took a pull on my cigarette and then exhaled. “But experienced with life… Even I don’t know about that.” I looked into the sky. “Stars… aren’t they amazing…?”
“You are.” he said to me, his voice extremely close. He was on my left side.
“You’ve just met me.” I turned my head towards him.
“As you have me, have you ever heard of ‘Love at first sight,’?” He stared at me intently.
“Yeah, but I’ve also heard of ‘One night stands.'” I reassured him.
That night, could not be explained. And if the walls in his apartment could talk I could only imagine what they’d tell you.
“Rach?” Jessie sings my name as she waves her hand in front of my face.
“Huh?” I shake my head and shut my eyes.
“I thought I lost you! Jesus, don’t scare me like that, anyways.” She continues; I daze out again.
I hear her, but I don’t hear her. No, I’m not listening, I’m thinking. It’s about Peter. His skin, the way his shoulder blades feel under my hands. His kiss, his touch, the way he moves, the heat. The intense heat that even Craig couldn’t produce, the intimacy that he induces upon me.
“Rach!” Jessie wakes me up again. “Seriously? Twice in a row Rach, come on now. What are you thinking about?” She says to me with an upset look on her face.
“I’m sorry Jessie, it’s nothing.” I lied.
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